Chennai Born Confused Softie
Chennai Ambi's Musings...
Sunday, April 24, 2005
Direct from GLIM Computer lab
The sex ratio is arnd 74:26 and experience ratio is 87:13 . the most facinating aspect is that the average work ex including the freshers strength is close to 4 years which is amazing considering the very fact that we are the second batch. have a lot more to write but unf: have little time at my expense to continue further..till then adios..
Wednesday, April 20, 2005
LasT day at Cognizant
So what did i do the last day at CTS. i went to office at arnd 10 AM and then immediately checked my blog and mail. unfortunately no interesting mail had come. being the last day at office i decided to make optimum use of that and started writing a long farewell mail to my ELT batchmates as well as to other juntha.the mails were really long. i guess arnd 600 wordsand i tried my maximum in pulling each one's leg for the final time and i guess i suceeded in that venturewithout getting any brickbats.
Then i had my exit interview at arnd 3:30 . went to the CSI office and to all their questions answered truthfully without hiding any facts . One of my colleagues had asked me "Dei , HR kitta enna da sonna ??" . i replied in True thalaivar ishtyle "Unmaiyaa sonnen" . I was happy that i had a chance to finally tell my grouses .
then went for the final tea session (somewhat similar to the LAST SUPPER) . it was really nostalgic. the bunk kada tea and masala vadai,i am really going to miss that.
too bad that it was the EOD and there wasno masala vada to bid me farewell.i took some snaps of the various hangouts in my office ,the terrace the sandwich stall,the research lab where i was working as an undercover agent for NASA (trust me ,its true none of my project superiors knew that i existed),the giant AC and snaps with some of the good ol brats of briends.
so i quit CT$ with a happy heart but the ppl at CT$ with a heavy heart.
From tomorrow Haripi ban jata Gentleman aka B-school stud ;-)
Wednesday, April 13, 2005
Arasampatti with his wife, Trisha and cow, Meenatchi. He lives a quiet, contented life looking after his farm with his wife.
zzzzz flashback to when Captain was a young student in his college, jollu uttufying behind trisha. One day, one of the students in the college, who incidentally is also behind trisha, challenges Captain to a game of tennis to decide who is the real hero.
Trisha loves Captain and cajoles him into practicing hard for tennis so that he can beat the villain and show who is who. Not only that, trisha tells Captain that, he must not only conquer this frontier but also win a GOLD MEDAL for INDIA in the Olympics. With all this in mind, Captain practices hard and defeats the villain (that?s pretty simple for captain actually). During the practice sessions there is a
song with trisha in a mini-mini-skirt and captain playing with tennis balls. As you all know captain is so naughty so he plays around?err, u get the drift?
Captain then goes onto the Olympics. One secret of Captain?s success is that he drinks his cow Meenatchi?s milk everyday. So captain takes special permission to take the cow along, so that he can win the Gold Medal. He milks Meenatchi between every change over and drinks it. Captain breezes through the initial rounds and meets
John Mcenroe in the final. The match is going really close and Mcenroe is
winning. Then trisha who is in the stands, starts singing ?mannava unakku
enda mcenroe va potti, nee jeyicha enikki rathiri lootti??.? then
Captain brings out Meenatchi and milks her and drinks it all in one gulp,
spilling most of it on his chest (the cameraman focuses on his chest and the girls
in the crowd faint at the sight of Captain?s powerful muscles). Now that Captain is refreshed he goes back and beats the shit out of Mcenroe. Mcenroe who isn?t used to being beaten, badmouths Captain. Captain, never one to miss out on an opportunity for a dialog, looks at Mcenroe with his steely eyes, gives him one of his
special nakkal smiles and says ?enda Thirunavukkarasu-kku aruvalum
veesa theriyum, tennis racquet-um veesa theriyum. Naan oru missan
(mission) la vandurukken, edula nee enna da, ongappan vanda kooda,
enna thadukka mudiyadhu.? He wins easily and during the presentation
ceremony talks about how he trained hard for his success and thanks
his ?thai mannu?, trisha and Meenatchi. He comes back to India to a
hero?s welcome, but Captain does not want glory and fame, so he goes and
settles in the small village and manages the farm. There he and
trisha live happily singing a couple of songs now and then.
zzzzz Present?.. Sania finds her way to Arasampatti and convinces Captain to coach her so that she can win the Olympic Gold Medal. Trisha is reluctant, but Captain is adamant that India must be win a gold medal and the only chance is Sania and Sania?s
only hope is CAPTAIN. Captain then trains Sania and puts all his effort into it.
He even tells her that she can win if she drinks Meenatchi?s milk. Meenatchi, though very old now, still produces milk so that Sania can win the Gold medal (After all, Meenatchi is an Indian cow).
The Olympics comes and Sania, Captain and Meenatchi travel to London where the Olympics are being held. Sania being Captain?s student breezes through the
initial rounds and meets Serena Williams in the finals. Sania gets injured in between and is limping her way through the match with difficulty. Captain is cool as usual. He goes to milk Meenatchi so that Sania can regain her energy. But the villains have given her an injection to stop her from giving milk. In fact,
Meenatchi is almost dead. If only they knew who they were up against they
wouldn?t have done it. But anyway, Captain starts on the family song
and Meenatchi gets up and gives milk. Sania who is now recharged, goes back and starts playing amazing tennis. The linesman makes a wrong call. Odane namma Captain enters the scene ?oru chinna tennis ball, line-a thandudha thandalaya nnu ozhunga
solla mudiyalaye, anga oru periya Line of Control-a thaandi theevaravathinga varaanga. Kashmir-la rathriyum pagalum uyirukku anjama natta kappatharaanga enga nattin veerargal. adunaala daan, enikki naanga olymbics la vandu epdi tennis adarom.
Anda tyagigala nenacchu paaru, onnoda velaiya nee ozhunga seyya mudiyum? (kanna
pinna senti daan, but Captain cant resist talking about Pakistani theevaravadhis)
Sania continues to play and suddenly Meenatchi dies. Sania becomes heartbroken and starts losing. Captain cannot do anything. Sania tries her very best. Its
match point for Serena and Sania breaks her leg. The aspirations and
hopes of a billion Indians and millions of Tamillans are at stake. Appo namba Captain
takes a brave decision .... To play in the place of Sania. But how can
he play, he is old and tired and moreover he does not have Meenatchi milk.. Then Trisha comes to rescue. She says "Mama, ungalukkage, naan speciala nethikku yaarukkum teriyama, Meenatchi paal oru bottle vechiriken, inthaanga". Captain is moved by Trisha's gesture. So he drinks the last drop of Meenatchi paal, and
enters the kalam to standing ovation of thousands of people. But, it is not over yet,
Pakistani theeviravaatigal, are still following our Captain trying to sabotage his plans. So there fire 2 shots hits our Captain in his hand and on his leg. Blood is
gushing out of Captains hand and legs, his eyes are red as usual. Medic team arrives
at the scene, but our Captain refuses any help. He gets up, finally and the
crowd is cheering loudly. Trisha is crying. Meenatchi maadu somehow comes back
to life(no one knows how, its coz of Captains dedication to tamil). He gets up and
serves , but Serena returns really well, and Captain misses it and falls. Serena
is celebrating her win, when our Captain gets up, chases the ball just before
it touches the ground and hits it with all his force. The ball goes
out of the court and the umpire is about to declare a win for Serena, and amazingly enough it boomerangs back and lands on the line. Our Captain saves India's
maanam, and says "en uyir , en udal ellam tamilke, tamil vaazhga , tamil valarga....."
how is it ???
not mine..yet another fwd..
Monday, April 11, 2005
Preetha does it again--Makes it into IIMB
10th : 90 %(CBSE)
12th : 94 %(CBSE)
B.Tech hons from BITS pilani in EEE with a 9.86 CGPA(wowwwwwwwwwwww)
one international paper in VLSI
a 6 month internship at HP where her work was appreciated and is implemented by the indian post office,with her name featured on the credits..how's that..??
2 years of work ex at WIpro in VLSI divison.
so it has to be obvious that she needs an IIMB to embellish her glossy resume.and she does that with panache.
advantages of having such a cousin
1) you can brag to friends that u have an IIMB stud as a cousin and get her intro to offer funda abt CAT(to be true,she was aking me fundae abt CAT ..that is life i guess..its so ironical...wah...sobs...wail.. j/k)
2) at an later stage when u need to get into a good company u can always use her aquaintances to land up a great job.
3)whichever place she goes to,there are lotta pretty babes arnd,so it means u do stand a chance provided u r in her good books .
1) only one disadvantage--all relatives expect you to emulate her which is nearly impossible.
ask her to play cricket or TT like me.. i am not a great player but i think i can beat her playing blindfolded.hee..hee.. a sadistic pleasure in saying that.
all said and done..preetha u have made us proud and hope u bring greater laurels to our family name and hope u live up to the reputation of being Prashanth's cousin.please dont dissapoint me ;-).
IIMB juntha a girl to really watch for..anything with academics this girl is gonna fire on all cylinders.
so this year all cousins will finally mange to move into PG level. me preetha and prasad were the only ppl working after our engineering and now we will be pursuing our PG in management
Preetha - IIMB
Prashanth and Prasad - GLIM...
Tuesday, April 05, 2005
Divorced CAT Marrying GLIM
The nichidartham or bride looking ceremony happened on april 2nd and her parents after grilling me for 30 minutes decided that i was a good suitor for their daughter and decided to give her in hand to me. so its all decided and we are getting married on april 27th this year.she wants a real long honeymoon so i am calling quits with my best friend too. then after a year i will have to search for another best friend. but from now on its just going to be me and her namely GLIM.
Friday, April 01, 2005
For those of you that would like a way to vent frustration or anger, follow this valuable lesson...it works !
When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know.
I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I'd forgotten to make. I found the number and dialled it.
A man answered, saying "Hello." I politely said, "This is Frank. Could I please speak with John?"
Suddenly the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude.
I tracked down John's correct number and called him. I had transposed the last two digits of his phone number. After hanging up with him, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again. When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled "You're an arsehole!" and hung up.
I wrote his number down with the word 'arsehole' next to it, and put it in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or having a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, "You're an arsehole!" It always cheered me up.
When caller ID came to the area, I thought my therapeutic 'arsehole' calling would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, "Hi, this is John Smith from BT. I'm calling to see if you're familiar with Caller ID?"
He yelled "NO!" and slammed down the phone.
I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're an arsehole!"
One day I was at the supermarket, getting ready to pull into a parking spot. Some guy in a black BMW cut me up and pulled into the spot I had patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I'd been waiting for that spot.
The prat ignored me. I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his car window, so I wrote down his number.
A couple of days later, right after calling the first arsehole (I had his number on speed dial,) I thought that I'd better call the BMW arsehole, too.
I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?"
"Yes, it is."
"Can you tell me where I can see it?"
"Yes, I live at 21 Acacia Avenue. It's a yellow house, and the car's parked right out in front."
"What's your name?" I asked.
"My name is Dave Matthews," he said.
"When's a good time to catch you, Dave?"
"I'm home every evening after five."
"Listen, Dave, can I tell you something?"
"Dave, you're an arsehole!" Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed dial, too. Now, when I had a problem, I had two arseholes to call.
Then I came up with an idea. I called arsehole #1.
"Hello. You're an arsehole!" (But I didn't hang up.)
"Are you still there?" he asked.
"Yeah," I said.
"Stop calling me," he screamed.
"Make me," I said.
"Who are you?" he asked.
"My name is Dave Matthews."
"Yeah? Where do you live?"
"Arsehole, I live at 21 Acacia Avenue, a yellow house, with a black Beamer parked in the front."
He said, "I'm coming over right now, Dave. And you had better start saying your prayers."
I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, arsehole."
Then I called Arsehole #2. "Hello?" he said.
"Hello, arsehole," I said.
He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are..."
"You'll what?" I said.
"I'll kick your arse," he exclaimed.
I answered, "Well, arsehole, here's your chance. I'm coming over right now." Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I lived at 21 Acacia Avenue, and that I was on my way over there to kill my cheating bastard of a gay lover.
Then I called Channel 4 News about the gang war going down on Acacia Avenue.
I quickly got into my car and headed over to Acacia Avenue with my video camera. There I saw two arseholes beating the crap out of each other in front of six police cars, a police helicopter and a Channel 4 news crew.
NOW I feel much better. Anger management really works. I have the video to prove it!