Chennai Born Confused Softie

Chennai Ambi's Musings...

Monday, September 27, 2004

When everything goes wrong !!

I had vowed never to write about CAT but i just cannot refrain myself from doing so.I wanna pour it out.I wanna cleanse myself and go afresh this week.My parents were a little bit disturbed and asked whether i needed to see a psychologist . I really pity them more than pitying myself.I know they have done their best in providing me with all facilities and yet i am unable to fulfill their wishes.When all my peers are in US doing their MS and their parents proudly claim that their sons have got aid and have got a job i can see the wishful thinking in my mom's eyes as to when her son would also reach that pedestal and when she can also raise her head.Her only wish as far as to my knowledge had been to see me packed off to US to do an MS and yet i failed her in that account.i want to make it up by bagging a seat in the prestigious IIMs but now i know it seems very unlikely.I am not able to go beyond a certain range in my Mocks.I have tried each and evry goddanmn fucking strategy.Invariably i goof up big time in one section or do not it eventually lands me somewhere near the prescribed cutoff ,missing sectional cutoff in one section.Why is this happening to me!! why always me ??

I know that i am not that bad.I have a very good vocabulary,good grammar,good analytical skills yet i am unable to make the cut.Does that mean that i am not good for CAT.If this were april or may i would have quit CAT but i have done so much that its really difficult to forsake it @ last stage.My parents have been very appreciative and have said that CAT is not life and failure is the stepping stone to success,but i cannot accept the fact.I have spent close to 1000 hours of my time preparing for CAT.It is said that Luck favours the hardworking,in my case it has never been.How else do i explain the fact that after narrowing down my options to two i invariably mark the wronger one.I just cannot accept defeat.I am fighting a losing battle with even time running against me ,but having come so far i just dont want to lose.I ate,dreamt and slept only CAT for the past 5 months.I dont want my dreams to get shattered.the more i think of it the more frightening the prospects seem.Life is much more than CAT and it is not necessary that i need an IIM to be succesfull in life,i very well know that.But at this stage i wanna emerge an winner ,i wanna gladden the hearts of my parents .They deserve much more.In all my life i have not done anything worthwhile,my father bought me a seat in engineering,coz i floundered my 12th,i failed miserably in my GRE ,did not do any wothwhile projects during college which would have ensured me aid in some foreign univ.The sole highlight being i got a job in campus.Given the current state of affairs of IT,i dont think it is a great achievement to rave about.

The label of "Loser" looms large over my head.I dont want to be a loser again.I wanna win this battle.I have the spirit,but i need the luck terribly more than that.
When will i have my piece of the cake i so rightfully deserve(Yes i deserve it,i donno about others but i definitely want my share ).Will i get it??

:: scribbled by Prashanth at 9/27/2004 04:49:00 PM (1) Comments
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Tuesday, September 21, 2004

Two great articles..

There was a couple married for quite some time and they had a boy some 5-6 years old. The relationship b/w the couple was turning
sour. So finally it reached such a stage that they thought it was better for them to be divorced than carry on such a relationship.

So they consulted a lawyer. But the big question was who would have the kid.
In the hearing in the court. it was decided that this choice should be left on the kid.So the judge asked "beta would you like to stay with your

"Kid said no mummy beats me :(( So the judge asked "beta would you like to
stay with your papa then ?" Kid said no papa beats me:((Now the judge was
in a dilemma and was not able to decide what to do... after pondering for
some time he smiled with the ides he had in his mind about the child......
and he gave the judgment that the kid would stay with......

any guesses????????

come on I know you can make it......

ok here goes the answer

the kid would stay with Indian Cricket Team because they


i bet everybody would second me...

The second one

Little Billy came into the kitchen where his mother
was making dinner. His birthday was coming up and he
thought this was a good time to tell his mother what
he wanted.
"Mom, I want a bike for my birthday."

Little Billy was a bit of a troublemaker. He had
gotten into trouble at school and at home. Billy's
mother asked him if he thought he deserved to get a
bike for his birthday. Little Billy, of course,
thought he did. Billy's mother, being a Christian
woman, wanted him to reflect on his behavior over the
last year and write a letter to God and tell him why
he deserved a bike for his birthday.

Little Billy stomped up the steps to his room and sat
down to write God a letter.

Dear God,

I have been a very good boy this year and I would like
a bike for my birthday. I want a red one.
Your friend, Billy

Billy knew this wasn't true. He had not been a very
good boy this year, so he tore up the letter and
started over.

Dear God,

This is your friend Billy. I have been a pretty good
boy this year, and I would like a red bike for my
Thank you, Billy

Billy knew this wasn't true either. He tore up the
letter and started again.

Dear God,
I have been an OK boy this year and I would really
like a red bike for my birthday.

Billy knew he could not send this letter to God
either, so he wrote another letter.


Dear God,
I know I haven't been a good boy this year. I am
very sorry. I will be a good boy if you just send me a
red bike for my birthday.
Thank you, Billy

Billy knew, even if it was true, this letter was not
going to get him a bike. By now, Billy was very upset.
He went downstairs and told his mother he wanted to go
to church. Billy's mother thought her plan had worked
because Billy looked very sad.

"Just be home in time for dinner," his mother said.

Billy walked down the street to the church and up to
the altar. He looked around to see if
anyone was there. He picked up a statue of the Virgin Mary. He
slipped it under his shirt and ran out of the church,
down the street, into his house, and up to his
room.He shut the door to his room and sat down with a piece
of paper and a pen. Billy began to write his letter to




:: scribbled by Prashanth at 9/21/2004 05:07:00 PM (7) Comments
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Friday, September 17, 2004

Movies which i completely adored !!

I am a tamil movie freak. Barring the movies which deal abt godesses and other small budget movies i manage to see the rest.For the record in 2002 78 tamil films were released and me and my friend had managed to see 60 of it.The rest as u can guess belonged tothe low budget film category.

I love romance.Being born in a state where conservatism rules the roost,films served as an ideal medium where we could fantasize ourselves.We danced with the heroines,beat up baddies who were twice our size and what not else.That too having done our graduation in coimbatore a place inundated with engineering colleges bereft of good looking girls cinemas offered us a respite by alowing us to date the gorgeous on screen stars in our dreams.

Lemme rate the movies and dialogues which i adored!
Fisrt and foremost alaipayuthey"
The way Maddy first proposes to her is unbelievable...
"nee azhaga irukkena Ninaikala...Un mela aasa padala aana ethellam nadanthidumonuu payama irukku ...yosichu sollu..."..That was too goddamn natural. After seeing that scene i was also tempted to try that but alas!there were no local trains in coimbatore and nor do u find girls like shalini in the trains.

The next film is also maddy's.This time it is Minnale.The way he takes the cup in which reema drinks water is so dumb but all the more romantic.No wonder love makes some males real dumb.All of us wud have done things like this but it took a director like gautam to bring it on screen.The background score aided minnale a lot esp: the humming of "ennai poo pol koithavale" .The way Maddy woos her is simply superb.The place where maddy takes reema is breathtaking!! so calm and serene ,yet so romantic.

Third one unf: and ironically belongs to maddy again.This time its "kannathil muthamittal" .The scenes between maddy and simran are few yet mani ensures that it leaves a mark on the viewers.when maddy proposes to simran saying that he needs a mom for the girl he is gonna adopt and will she marry him,simran sarcastically remarks that " Is she a free product obtained due to the adoption"(i am sorry i am unable to put the apt words in english).The film totally belongs to keerthana and the way her contrasting emotions are prtrayed is simply superb.A must watch film for those who believe in meaningful cinema.I definitely feel that this film deserves an oscar.compared to the hype lagaan created, this movie was far ahead in terms of content.

fourth One is "kadhalikku mariyadhai" the only silver lining in vijay's career.Wow! is the word i can use for this film.

next in genre comes " parthiban kanavu and paarthen rasithen" two films where the heroine completely entices the conservative male audience.

Best Proposals

1) Ajith proposing to jyothika in Vaali in the boat.Unbeatable
2) Remember Karthik in Mouna Raagam " Mr.Chnadramouli.."
3) Our own Maddy ishtyle in Alaipayuthey
4) Maddy in Minnale and kannathil Mutham ittal
5) Vikram in sethu to abhitha in the classroom
6) Sidharth in "aayitha ezhuthu"..the scene where he tells that he wud like to tonsure their children's head in pittsburg venkatachalapathy koil..i simply loved that.Belonging to the genre of " I too wanna go to america " sidharth's character was pretty much close to mine the sole difference being he was much more skilfull when dealing with

ALL time favorite...BAASHA---the immortal film

:: scribbled by Prashanth at 9/17/2004 10:38:00 AM (0) Comments
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Wednesday, September 15, 2004

PG !! whats happened to you?

Mod Bashing!! Dishum !!! Dishum !!
Cheater !! Liar !!! "I know who you are"...

These are the prominent things that are happening in these days and to be frank i am not at all amused. This is not for any publicity purpose but to purely vent my anger at people who have reduced the forum to such levels.

The forum was meant as a place where ppl could come and relax ,make new friends,hold intellectual debates ,clarify doubts but now those things seem like past memories.

With Increase of Membership the quality has also come down and That really pains me.there used to be day wherein i was in the forum for 3-4 hours everyday,but now due to personal limitations i am unable to do so.But i guess i dont lose much anyway.Majority of the threads are jus modified questions on how top prep for CAT.And then u have the Aimcat,Sim threads where ppl post their scores and some poor innocent chap miscalculates his score and posts one which is way ahead of his obtained score.There cud be many reasons why that happened mebeb he calculated it wrongly or teh comps calculated it wrongly or he cud have even inflated it to boost his ego.Nothing wrong in that. Its purely his personal thing and nobody can deride him for that.If you are pissed off by that u can either shoot a mail to him or start ignoring further posts.But mudslinging in an open forum shows u in poor taste.All u wannabe managers who resorted to these kinda cheap behaviour ought to be ashamed of yourselves.Its just that your ego was deflated by his scores and when u found them fake to boost your ego you started defaming him.

As for the sherlock holmes who unrevealed this secret,i am sorry to say the scotland yard or RAW is already full with ppl and dont need any more spies.It was worthless info which u found.It was very much similar to finding a 10 paise coin from a dustbin.

so whats happened to the close knit community which existed 6 months back.I can recall each of teh PG meets which i attended.Some of my best friends i have are from PG and lemme reiterate u wont find ppl like chandoo,allwyn,simba or anil anywhere else.Contribute positively and get benifitted from the forum.thats been the purpose.If u wanna mudsling create an yahoo profile and mud sling as much as u want.
nobody's gonna bother.

For those who are really looking at sites where there aren't ppl who mudsling and where u can find good verbal material this site is the one for u..

:: scribbled by Prashanth at 9/15/2004 04:57:00 PM (1) Comments
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Friday, September 10, 2004

How i wish !!!

Real whimsical wishes...

How i wish aishwarya rai would come over to me and propose only to be rejected by me.She would say that there is no life without me and she wants to have a happy and blissfull middle class indian life with me and again i explain to her saying that she is not my type .she says she is and i start questioning her on the basics of cricket and she is dumbfounded.I ask her what are her favorite novels and she says she loves "famous Five and Nancy drew".yuck!!

i then tell her that culturally as well intellectually both of us are disparate and i cannot yield in to her request.she says she will commit suicide if i dont accept her.Now the Philosopher in me comes forth and advises her on what love is which is actually nothing but an illusion "Maya" . then in typical rajni style i tell her that "kidaike vendiyathu kidaikkama irukkathu kidaikaama irukkathu kidaikave kidaikathu ".By magic she understands these and says that yet she loves me and in typical cinematic way she tells me "wherever you are be happy and i will always yearn for your happiness and wait till eternity longing for your love" and decides to spend the rest of her life as a spinster...

Next mani ratnam film i am the hero and kate winslet is the heroine(she's somehow my favorite..a typical angrezi naatu kattai..) . the story is about a young iyer boy who goes to the US for pursuing his MS and in the process due to unavoidable circumstances falls in love with a white. the love blossoms and when both of us are about to express our unconditional love for each other my student visa expires and i have to return to India.How they unite forms the remaining part of the story.
Father role: maddy
Mother role : trisha
car driver : kamal haasan
villain : hrithik roshan
house maid: mallika sherawat(Homely character)

dont ask me why i have written this nonsense....even i dont know why??

:: scribbled by Prashanth at 9/10/2004 04:12:00 PM (2) Comments
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Thursday, September 09, 2004

Madura the Movie-A Freak review..

if u r in a urge to see "Madura" please do reconsider ur desicion ...
If u think that being a collector u must wear neat clothes,walk legibly,spk politely,do worthful things....thenu r wrong cos VIJAY -hero of madura being a collector wears a cut baniyan,torn jeans with kerchief tied in knees,tatoos in his wrist and allows shankar mahadevan to sing as usuala in his tone"machaan peru madura..."(appo mathavanga peru ellam ...kumbakonam,sirkali,mayavaram....)

I think the director is a great english maestro cos he doesnt fully pronounce the word"madurai"..instead he calls it as "madura"
(i -silent...only this "i" is silent ,all others shout thru out the film in high decibels).

A normal guy who is suspected for a pickpocket is being pocketted by police very easily,but a collector who is being suspected for a murder case so easily comes out of his place,goes to other place, searches onother job,loves onother girl,dances in market every 1/2 hr with only a small disguise (chinna paapa kooda kandu pidichudum......full meesai irukura collector trim panna udaney yaarukumey adayalam theriyaadhaam....ada pongapaa!!!)

They r used to fill up song sequences(orey nalla figure sonia agarwalyum murder pannidaraanga).there is one white buffalo used as heroine and named as rakhshita,,she plays an MLA's daughter but appear to be a very poor girl wearing only minimum amount of dress (may be she might have used in her kindergarden classes),seeing her condition in dance sequences we can see tears flowing from viewrs eyes mixed with "jollu"flowing from mouth. And u wonder how come she cool lly tells that she does a project for her studies in such a koyembedu market.(inimey adutha heroines ellam kannamapettai,coovam,besant nagar beach ..inga ellam project apply panlaam)

Side characters:
Sambandhamey illama hero oda aathaavaa seetha. and we get astonished by a medical treatment given by VIJAY to cure his dumb sister, he dives inside sea pretending to be dead while his sister shouts"Annaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"and she gets speech.
cho chimplllllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeee.(inimey doctor ellam operation sudukatlayey vachukalaam,,cos adhirichiyileyey patient will get cured).
vadivelu as VIJAY's assistant.when hero vijay gets in a murder case he hides himslef,why the hell did vadivel also change himself is a twist till the end?

collector's duty:

although Vijay is a collector he doesnt forget to perform his duties like
1.peeking into heroines bathroom.
2.getting kite upon heroines bathroom.
3.dancing in street.
3.heavy flow of dialogues like"naan conventla padicha collector illai,corparation schoola padichavan,naan vera madhiri"

asusual tamil film type villain,both vijay and villain have tough competition between each other in shouting"yeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy"
and thank god, the winners are audiences who shout seeing these sensible scenes.


the comedy portion is being taken by stunt director,we are amazed to see vijay being beated blue in one scene and he hits a big wood log and it turns into onother scene he flies in air, jumps over several cars high,runs very fast ,bicycles winning a car. we think that if vijay might have turned to olympics we c'd have got a medal.

??????????????ada pongapaa!!!
last but not least we have heard that ajeeth is now in happiness that madura might turn a flop.
while is vijay is ready with his onother subject........."chenna"-------->actually "chennai" but as usual--- "i" ---silent---------so "chenna".

:: scribbled by Prashanth at 9/09/2004 02:10:00 PM (0) Comments
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Thursday, September 02, 2004

I too Will be Coding

This hallowed words!!How long i wished that even i will be able to tell this!!Hopefully it will come true this week.I am supposed to meet an manager who will allocate some coding work in his project.its a great improvement for a guy who was initially in a testing project.Just hope that i too do some meaningful work which involves the thought process.The past one year has been spent in doing the same ol' testcases and scrubbing teh bench.Now gotta learn something w.r.t S/W so taht i can justify myself at the interviews next year(I am practising Optimism).TIME mocks results were usual i have fared badly.10 marks below my 30 errors 10 more than i anticipated and i had attempted just 91 contrary to 95 that i calculated.anyways the mark was an improvement.rank improved marginally.DI again i suck.Not once have i cleared DI cutoffs.

TIME ranks have been 5000 1800 2000
CL ranks have been 1800 850 275

My net has still 2-3 more weeks before which i can strike form..

I will in all probability be coding in ASP if god is gracious enough to bestow it upon me.That one will be enough to relieve me of half my burden coz i will always have a job which i love and work that is challenging and also which will provide me ample scope for my career aspirations.I will not be cribbing to my friends that my work is run of the mill,even a school kid can do,why did i study engineering,blah blah.. . I really pity them.They have listened very patiently to my cribbings all this one year.I simply love my company,but the kinda work is what really turns me off.Anyways hoping that things return to normalcy and i too will be talking in coding jargons like assemblies,manifests,tablespaces blah blah....

This week gotta cross 50 + in TIME and 55 + in CL.
TIME missed it by .33 got 49.66...Mebbe God doesn't want to give everything to me in a single shot.I am sure he is with me.

Had a chat with chandoo in the afternoon and he really made me realise where i was.he sounded the alarm bells for me.Its the time to surge ahead and not be left gaping as others cross you.I have reached a saturation level w.r.t there is something inherently wrong in my approach.Ideally speaking i should be hitting the top 200 ranks by now which i am not.What does this call for??An intense 6 hour analysis today.I need to take up some FLTs to boost my ego which has been terribly hurt by the TIME results.I scored terribly in DI.Gotta see what errors i have made.
time to leave.I need a top 400 rank in TIME this mock.will i get it is the big question.Gotta make rapid strides!!

Chandoo thanks a lot for making me realise where i am now and what all i have to do!!
God guide me thru this ordeal till i make it to the most hallowed MBA Insti in this country.

:: scribbled by Prashanth at 9/02/2004 10:32:00 AM (0) Comments
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